Thanks For RatingĪYOUR friend is a messer. But secretly, I feel this will put an end to the physical part of our relationship, which is something I don't want to happen. We have both pledged to drink less in order to remember things better - not about this, but generally to be able to remember the night before. But I feel guilty and wonder if what I did was sexual assault? My friend has no memory of it, or at least hasn't said anything, and we've continued as normal. I did not reveal what happened to my friend, for fear of hurting our friendship. However, there was recently a repeat performance, again when we were both drunk, and this time, I must admit, very much at my instigation.
And it didn't in any way damage our friendship, which somewhat surprised me. He had no memory of it and we agreed not to talk of it again. He asked me was I sure and I just said I thought so, not wanting to say what I really felt, namely how could I ever forget it. The next morning, I told my friend what had happened. On a drunken night out a couple of months ago, we were sharing a bed in a friend's flat and began to kiss, and were sexually intimate. Should I avoid seeing these things? And if so, how can I? Such embraces are a regular occurrence on a night out. Where does this leave me sexually? Am I bisexual? When my friend embraces his girlfriend, or when I see them in bed together, I become depressed and quite upset. I do fancy girls, would like to have a close girlfriend, but am afraid there is nobody I could love more than this friend of mine. I am quite openly camp but refuse to call myself gay.
But I don't fantasise sexually about other men, and have had sexual experiences with many girls, although I am still a virgin. For a period during my teens, I did battle with my sexuality and did, at one point, have similar feelings for a much older male relative. Yes, he is aware that I count him as my best friend, and yes, he would count me as one of his best friends, but that's it. I refuse to allow my situation to be labelled as the usual 'gay guy falls for straight guy'. And during this year, my feelings for this friend grew and grew to where they are today. Efebep, dune, ewoca For the first time in my life, I felt I fitted in with the crowd.
0 kommentar(er)
